By Zaki Imtiaz
As Muslims, we often hear the virtues of motherhood and the benefits that kids bring to their mothers. However, it seems that fatherhood and its joy and importance often get ignored in the process. So, I decided to compile a list of some things that I’ve learnt and experienced from being a father. All the fathers-to-be and new fathers will find it beneficial inshaAllah.
So once you’re a father, you’ll find that the following things have happened:
- Your love for your spouse deepens.
- You have to take responsibility not only of your own actions but also of your family’s.
- You have to try and adapt yourself to you baby’s sleep time to get some rest. He is too small to follow your routine.
- Even if you start following your infant’s sleep cycle, you still have to strive hard to get a good, refreshing sleep. 😛
- All of a sudden, you start feeling much older.
- You have multiple jobs now. One that is outside your house, earning money for the family, and the other with your cute little angel at home.
- The unique feeling you get when your baby looks at you and smiles is priceless.
- You start to acutely realize the hardships that your parents have gone through: skipped sleep, suffered cramps in their biceps rocking you at night, declining all the fun with friends because they were busy with you.
- Time passes too quickly. You angel’s birth feels moments ago, as new milestones are achieved one after the other.
- Technically, you have lesser time to spend with you spouse, but your bond and the quality of that time improves.
- Most of the time you’re busy in nurturing your kid, either physically or spiritually, or discussing with your wife about his upbringing, values and character.
- You become more future oriented. You start to think proactively.
- Your mind works on over-drive as you plan your child’s schooling according to Islamic values and plan for him to become a Hafiz and Qari.
- You start seeing life as a grand opportunity to shape up a human being, to inspire a complete nation (through his progeny) to become Allah’s slaves, and for you and your wife to becoming the leaders of Muttaqoon (pious people) yourself.
- You sometimes find it difficult to manage your relationship with your wife, because now she has two babies to handle: you and your baby! She’s fragile, so handle with care 😉
- Your wife loves you even more, for helping her out in the baby chores, makes du’aa for you, and prays for you to stay with your family till the end.
- All your childish, immature and irresponsible behavior is gone. You have to be a DAD now and you need to be responsible. Expect your kid to be exactly like you.
- You are more concerned about savings now, because living in an expensive era, it’s important when it comes to good education and Islamic nurturing of your kids.
- Now you’re remembering Allah Subhanahu wa Ta’ala and his commandments more. You have a journey to walk together with you family. Your journey back to home, to Jannah!
Alhamdulillah I have found my experience to be life changing. Do you find yours? Please share more lessons with me so that I can learn even more 🙂
The writer is a software engineer and can be contacted at firstname.lastname@example.org