By Mohammad Ali
I remember a married couple who attended my wedding. I remember hearing the wife complaining to her husband that he did not compliment her despite the fact that she had spent so much time adorning herself. This is not just the story of one couple, but it is a occurence and cause for friction between couples. Wives complain that their husbands get bored of them or don’t like them anymore.
I don’t know how this happens. I can’t give an exact reason but there is one thing that I can tell. The benefits of following Islamic injunctions are immense, and only a person who acts on them can see the fruits. Imagine a man, controlling his desire, lowering his gaze, abstaining from intermingling and sitting with non-mehrams, abstaining from chatting, gossiping and joking with non-mehrams. Imagine when such a person gets married. When this man, who has waited patiently for a fulfilling gaze on this one woman, looks at his wife and when he sits with her, and talks to her; who can explain the incredible emotions that this person is feeling? I find it hard to believe that such strong and pure emotions can be felt by a man who has always been in company of non-mehram females, holding their hands, hugging them, talking to them, joking, and playing around with them. Same goes for the females too.
Allah prohibited intermingling of sexes and commanded women to do hijab and there is great great hikmah in it. Its not just about the unique feeling and excitement, but its about stable running of the family. Its about that promised love that Allah will put in hearts, about which He mentioned in the Quran:
“And among His Signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquillity with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): verily in that are Signs for those who reflect.” (30:21)
Yes, indeed there are signs in this for those who reflect. Anything that is put by Allah in hearts is pure and long lasting. Anything that is put through movies and songs and other such filth is impure and fleeting.
And then there are the benefits of Niqab. Ah, how unfortunate are the people who don’t understand these benefits. A woman who adorns and beautifies herself ONLY for her husband. And then when they go out, people look at her but in vain; she is totally covered and safe from all eyes. This is something that pleases the husband to an immense level. Gheerah (Jealousy) of a man is a natural feeling, and the Prophet (sallalahu alaihi wasallam) called those men duyooth who do not feel any gheerah regarding their women folk; he stated that a duyooth shall not enter Jannah. This gheerah is there in every man, in the subconscious, but it often gets buried deep down because of the behavior and values dictated by the media and the society around him. Such injustice! When this gheerah is buried deep down, and a man does not feel this great honor that his woman adorns herself ONLY for him, then friction does appear in the marriage.
The fact is that Islam is nothing but a mercy and a spectacular way of life for human beings. It is Deen ul fitrah. If someone acts on its commands, that person will soon witness its fruits. The barakah that is put by Allah in relationships cannot be substituted by any material blessings of the world. May Allah fill with barakah the life of every person who is striving to act on the hudood of Allah, and may Allah keep the married couples happy and fill love and mercy in their hearts and keep them steadfast on his Deen. Ameen.